What a day is in front of me, how will I cope?
There’s so much I must get done.
What shall I do first? Where do I start?
I’ve so many errands to run.
I guess the first thing’s to give Toby a walk,
It would be good to have some fresh air.
“Come on big boy, look sharpish, wake up!”
I haven’t all day to spend.
I’m pleased I’ve come out, it clears out the mind,
It also gives time to think.
“Oh Toby, don’t do that, I haven’t a bag,
How do you manage to make such a stink!”
Right, back home at last, what’s next on the list?
This Christmas things making me sick!
When I see all the ads, and all I must do,
It really gets on my wick.
Christmas cards next, now to who must I send?
There’s Roger and Muriel and Stan.
I won’t send to Jim – he didn’t last year –
I was never his greatest fan.
But there’s Aunty Katrina, Uncle Jack too,
Eric, and Diane, Brian and Sue.
Heather and Daphne, Dennis and Girt,
Katie and Mary, plus John with his shirt.
Each year it grows longer, the more I spend,
Just the thought of Christmas drives me right round the bend.
Well, can’t stop and grumble, there’s plenty to do,
There are mince pies and crumble, and turkey and stew.
Christmas cake, pudding, marzipan sweets,
Yule log and stuffing, and chocolate treats,
Brazil nuts and trifle, sausage on sticks,
I must peel the onions – Cor, they make my eyes pick!
I’ll get out my bowl; I must make a start,
But to be perfectly honest, I haven’t much heart.
I spend all year slimming, and watching my weight,
Then quick as a flash I’m thirteen stone eight!
Presents are next, that’s the bit I find hard,
Left up to me they’d get only a card.
“Ooh, it’s just what I need, you know me so well”,
But they mean “Can I change it”, you see, I can tell.
I’ll get them this year; I won’t be to blame
Whether male of female they’ll all get the same.
They’ll all get a present, a card with a text,
And a £15 voucher to exchange at NEXT!
I better get wrapping, times running out.
Just three weeks to Christmas I hear them all shout.
I’ve so much to do, can’t miss out not one.
I’ll not rest tonight until it’s all done.
Now lets run through the list, it must be complete,
We can’t be untidy, it must be all-neat.
So – dogs walked, the birds stuffed, the cards in the post,
Presents are finished, I’m ready to host –
The biggest best Christmas we’ve ever endured,
Yet.. there seems to be someone I might have ignored!!!